Thursday, September 30, 2010

Better day tomorrow

Well today went to food hell in a hand basket.  It started off great but when it came time for dinner things went south.  Thursday nights Anna has dance class and it's always a hurry up meal.  We didn't have anything planned for tonight so we ordered pizza hut.  The good news is tomorrow is a new day and a fresh start.

Didn't get my fitness on today either.  Just started my period and the first day is the worst so I decided today would be a "rest" day.

Here's tomorrow!

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

What a day...

WOW what a day this was today.  First I go to the gym blow my personal record away on the elliptical then I need to still burn 117 calories to meet my 500 calories for the day and I emailed my trainer and said what do I need to do and she said tonight is beautiful take your kids for a walk around and do a mile and you'll be at 500 calories for today. 

I called Andy on the way home from work and said I'm heading to daycare to get the kids and I'm going to take them for a walk around Cooper Creek pond.  It's 1.2 miles around.  I asked him if he wanted to join us.  Of course he met us there.  The kids had races while Andy and I got some chat time while getting our fitness in and just being able to connect as a family with nature is just blissful.  I loved it.  After our walk Andy went home to get a jump on dinner (yes my man cooks and loves it and so do I) and the kids and I stopped at the little play area they had.  That was the reward for walking around the pond. 

Anna says to me...Mom I loved tonight.  It was so fun to just be out there as a family and I feel healthy.  That just made my heart go a pitter patter...We have been on this healthy life kick for a while.  Granted we've done it better lip service than we truly have our bodies but it's kind of starting to gel.  I'm kind of getting it and best of all I think Anna is too. 

We've been letting Anna stay up late and watch the Biggest Loser with us and she's really taking it in and has said a thing or two about being healthy and how she's realizing that it's really important on what she puts into her body.  Sure we've said some stuff to her but really she's getting it and wants to live a healthy life. 

Today has been it's time to sleep to get up and do it all over again tomorrow.  Wish me luck. My goal is to burn at least 500 on the ARC trainer in 30 minutes.  My personal longest on the ARC is 15 minutes.  That thing scares the crap out of me.

PS....So far doing awesome on my no chocolate goal!  I did "cheat" today and had a mini tootsie roll.  What was that like 1 calorie and 2 grams of sugar.  I thought of Bethanny Frankel the whole time while eating it.  Just enjoyed it for the little pleasure it was and really focused on every bite and that was all I needed.  Who knew you didn't need to shove a half bag of tootsie rolls down your face before you realized what you done and then you no longer enjoy that little pleasure.

OK off to bed I go. 

383 / 2.78 / 35

What does that mean you ask…it means in 35 minutes I ran 2.78 miles on the elliptical and burned 383 calories. That is a personal best.

I alluded to yesterday that my gym is starting a 6 week challenge called "Calorie Countdown". We start on October 4th and the challenge is to burn 21,000 calories in the next 6 weeks. That is on average 500 calories a day. So this week I'm doing different things to see what I need to go to get at 500 calories a day. If I do 10,000 steps a day that counts towards the 21,000 calories

To finish my 500 calories for today I'm going to take the kids for a walk tonight after work and we're going to walk a mile. According to my personal trainer that will complete my 500 calories for today.
My ultimate goal is to do more than 500 a day because I really want to get in shape which means my skinny body will appear and the fat body will disappear!

Wish me luck!

Monday, September 27, 2010


I love the weekends but boy do I suck at the food thing on the weekends. Friday, Andy and I went out for dinner, then went to a small concert where we drank wine. Saturday, was Jack's 5th birthday and that day I just threw my hands up in the air and forgot I have 100+ pounds to lose. Yesterday was decent but not that great. Today I got on the scale...Umm not a good thing to do. Needless to say I'm now up to 249 pounds. My food choices obviously were not good and the fact that I drank more wine than water I'm sure doesn't help either. The good news on the wine front is that it's red so that's good for me right (HA).

So today is a new day. Today my personal goal is to totally avoid candy from my co-workers desk. She always has the fun sized butterfingers (my personal favorite and weakness), fun sized Kit Kats, Snickers, etc. It is almost 1pm and so far I've avoided them. Only 3 more hours to go. Tomorrow my goal is going to be to avoid them again and up my water in-take.

Oh speaking of water..while Andy and I were out for dinner on Friday the resturant did serve water with cucumber.. OMG that was so good!

Good things are coming my way in terms of my fitness goals and weight loss goals. Starting October 4th my gym is starting a challange called "Calorie Countdown". The goal is to burn 500 calories a day 7 days a week for 6 weeks. That is figured to be 10,000 steps a day. I signed up to do it and I plan on winning. The winner gets a body bug!

If any of my few followers has any suggestions on how to not totally blow it on the weekends I'm all ears.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Day 2

I had my last work one on one work out with my personal trainer today. It was kind of bitter sweet. I really like her and she pushes me with my strength but I'm kind of ready to do that part on my own.

Thankfully the gym at work has a class devoted to strength training so I can do that but I will miss the one on one.

I am journaling every thing that touches my lips and I must say this is tough. This is so much more difficult than I thought. I didn't realize how much junk I feed my body until I started writing it all down. I'm going to need some help in saying no to the sweets.

I swear the candy at the work place is the death of me. I have such a soft spot for chocolate and peanut butter. The chocolate covered peanut butter is the best EVER. I don't get hardly any peanut butter due to Jack's, my son, food allergies.

I'm also trying to apply the principals of "Naturally Thin" into my life but I love it all so much that I eat it down to the end. Why oh why food must you taste so good?

It's late, I had a late night work out, I don't want to eat and I'm hungry.

So long for tonight. I need to get to bed so I can wake up in the AM and eat some protein and drink my Joe...Oh Joe how I love thee

So it begins

This blog was meant to be posted last night, however I was so tired from the night before not being able to sleep that I did not make it down to the computer to post this blog.

Last night after watching the Biggest Loser I vowed and committed my life to change. I know this is so cliché but it's true.

Warning: If you don't want to know how much I weigh then stop reading now.

I am currently 247 pounds as of January 1, 2010 I was 260 pounds. Never have I seen myself as a 240+ pound woman until last night. There was a woman on the show who is married, has 5 kids, one of the 5 are autistic and in the midst of life she put herself last and is now 240+ because of a lack of taking care of herself. I saw this woman who weighs about the same as me, in the same life path (granted I only have 2 kids not 5 but I do have one that is autistic), has a fun spirit like me, wonderful husband like me, great life like me and is fat like me. For the first time I looked at the woman on the TV and saw what 240+ pounds looks like on me. I was disgusted and started to just sob. While laying in bed with my wonderful husband, Andy, I asked him if I look like those girls on TV that weigh 240+. He of course said no and I believe him in my head and in my heart but I know that others (not him) see me as that girl on TV that weighs 240+. I was sad for about a minute, got my good cry in and then became inspired. I could not sleep at all last night from being so excited that I got up and typed out a HUGE email to a dear friend who has gone before me who is on her journey not only to lose weight but to truly lead her whole life as a healthy person and not obese.

I only have about 117 pounds to lose (only, like it's just going to be a breeze to get it off and I should be down 117 pounds in a few months…HA). Just think of the hundreds of thousands of others that have so much to lose and how deflating and defeating it could be. It's truly heartbreaking.

The good thing about my journey is that I'm the self proclaimed "fittest fat girl on the planet". In February 2010 I climbed 1100 steps for the American Lung Association in honor of one of my girlfriends mom who passed away to a rare lung disease. I trained to run a 5K, but I didn't get to run it due to illness, I work out on average 4 times a week. The more I sweat the more I love myself and life.

Food along with millions of others is my problem. I don't have a favorite food it's all my favorite. All food good for you and all food bad for you. The ironic thing is that I truly crave good for you food over bad for you food.

So today, 09/22/10, with out even thinking (probably due to being tired because I stayed up late to type out an email and then I was to excited to sleep) go to our little coffee shop here at work and think, a White Mocha sounds good. So I get it. NEVER do I drink foo foo coffee, it's usually just regular coffee. Ugg what was I thinking. Then I proceed off and on through out the day to eat candy from a co-workers desk. They really need to outlaw candy on the desk at work. Not even thinking about it honestly. Uggg…the good news is I get to start over with the next thing that I put up to my lips. I can promise you, I will not be complacent again with my food choices especially since I've vowed to God, myself, and my family that from here forward we are going to not only lose weight but most importantly be healthy and not be a tragic statistic!

One of my girlfriends who was so close to having lap band surgery (I strongly considered this route as well) and at the last minute she decided she was going to give it one last shot on her own with out help from pills or surgery (this is the one I emailed last night). Needless to say she has lost over 100 pounds and is an athlete! She has always inspired and moved me. Not just because she's lost weight but in her life in general.

So my plans for this blog is to use it as some what of a journey for myself and a way to keep myself in check and not wonder why am I doing all this work and not losing weight. If I question that then I will have this blog to reference back to so I can see patterns. Chances are I will not share this blog with many so I won't most likely have a herd of followers but I do want to keep this as a blog for myself so I can physically write, see and share my life not only as a thin girl trying to get out of this fat body.

So get a water and some celery and enjoy the journey with me!